Truly Dealing with Anger, Beyond Behavior Management

Do you also manage your behavior but still feel uncomfortably angry?

  • Yes

  • No

  • I experience rage but don't know what you're talking about.

Results are only viewable after voting.
Sep 2020
Good ol' Earth
Not sure if this is the right section for this, please let me know if it isn't.

I have a lot of anger, I always have. All my life I've been very depressed, bouts of it would come for weeks or months at a time. And I also would have fits of rage. As I became less alienated from my emotions (since I very much was), I spent less time depressed and more time enraged. And I do mean rage; violent "uncontrollable" anger, and it was horrible for my family, I was destructive and scary. My sister would shake.

These days I've learned to manage my behavior; I do yoga, exercise, meditate, breathing visualization etc.; I've become aware and take the initiative to keep that crazy adrenal swelling in check so I don't scream, destroy or do any such unacceptable thing. So I have my behavior under control.

But I still suffer the same overflowing anger all the time, inside of me there's still rage and it really sucks. I even feel sick from it.

When I would go crazy, into an actual behavioral rage, this was the only time I felt like I had dealt with the emotion, that the emotion had been expressed and passed through me. Now although I control myself for the sake of others I'm left with this horrible anger and I haven't found another way to get rid of it. I can't even say that I feel raging is the only way; it seems like exactly the expression of what I'm feeling, to call it "the only way" as if there could be another almost seems absurd. So this is my question:

How can one process an overflowing, violent emotion without being overflowing and violent?

To be clear, I'm not talking about dealing with the source of this emotion: that's something I'm working on and it's a separate issue. And it's probably going to take a long time. In the mean time it would be nice to know the answer to this question. Maybe there isn't a way to do this, and the question really is absurd, but I'm asking people and I'm asking you.

Thank you
Mar 2020
I had severe anger which motivated me to accomplish normal things. Anger at a certain type of person who I wanted to not be like, which is useful motivation, but it got out of control.

You're right to say it's adrenaline, and probably a mixture of that and dopamine.

Try taking suppliments like copper or tryptophan and avoiding potassium and magnesium. Avoid smoking tobacco or pot. They increase dopamine.

Anger is a combination of adrenaline and dopamine IMO. I'm not a professional but I've spent a year studying it independently.

Try loving your mother. Mothers are easy to love. If you are suffering extreme fits it wouldn't hurt to become just a little bit of a mamas boy until you have it under control. Take her advice.

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