Should I apologize for setting limits?

Sep 2021
Hello! I'm wondering if it's okay to apologize for setting a boundary in the following situation: someone said something offensive to me during a phone call, I felt bad and tried to explain it to him in vain.. because he got defensive and wasn't paying attention to me, I asked to take a few minutes and he didn't want that, so I decided to hang up. Some time later I decided to go to sleep.

I talked with him later and he apologized for the comment, but he wants an apology because I hung up and went to sleep, he's mad about that.

Is what I did considered a boundary? I think it is.. if so, I shouldn't apologize for it, right?

Maybe I should apologize after all?
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Aug 2021
Austin, TX
If your culture considers what you have done rude behavior, then perhaps an apology could be in order. Also, if you want to keep the relationship alive, you might apologize, it does not cost you anything but pride...If, however, this person has a habit of putting you down or making you feel inferior, then perhaps this borders on abusive behavior and it is best to let this relationship lapse, no apology necessary.
Good luck either way,
Jul 2021
Never apologise for that. :) Setting boundaries is always good.

Hanging up has nothing to do with setting boundaries, that's in fact also breaking boundaries. Setting boundaries means you end up the phone call and never speak with them again until they apologise.