Mirroring of psychopaths?

Jul 2021
420
51
London
I am just curious of this behaviour. Say, you tell a parent you were a victim of certain behaviours, and she victimised you herself in those same ways, copying the criminal who victimised you, as an example, is that normal? And teaches the sibling too against me and my other sibling?

She claims her mother used to pit them against each other, and she has been doing the same ever since I left home. The elder sibling figured it out, but the younger sibling has become very abusive towards me, which is why I think it's over between us, unfortunately. I don't think that certain things are genetic, I really think since he was the only spoiled child in the family he may think my mother is fine. I think someone should tell him that my mother isn't fine, otherwise she is going to ruin his life, and the fact of the matter is he doesn't understand it is not fine.

I do think people change and he did change. He used to be this extremely intelligent person, and now he has lost a few neurons it seems as he's been acting completely out of character, thanks to my mother who doesn't even love us, but I really don't understand why he cares about her not loving us, and still thinks she like him, she really doesn't care, and is a very shallow person, simply she wants our attention. She would ruin her whole family so to make herself look good, but she is extremely loyal to her mother. Now, if my mother acts wrong, I tell you are acting wrong, but she never said that to her mother, she just wastes years complaining about her, and then acts in the same, and they have no family, but the issue is I did try hard to have a family, unlike her, because I do love my siblings, she doesn't love her siblings at all, and they never even abused her the way my younger sibling abused I and my elder brother, I hope they learn not to act like her and really just accept that mom is an idiot, let's be objective, it happens, not much you can do about that. Many people are in the same situation, but really don't act like her, as she acts like criminals she hears about. She lacks all moral views and empathy, if I said this person did something wrong she copies that. How crazy is that?

Social intelligence is also important and he doesn't have any, and he puts me down, but really by putting others down you are not aware. He says I am knowledgeable but not intelligent, really? I don't even think he knows what knowledge is. He said he wants to defame me too, as my mother asked him to because she knew someone did it against me and got away with it, and he is going to get away with it, and lie that I have a conduct problem. She is teaching him crime. I don't think someone who has good siblings who loved him should become like that, it makes sense if I did become a criminal, because I didn't have anybody, but he had me and my elder sibling, so he has no excuse to throw his own life away over some mother, big deal, she doesn't love you, who cares, you at least have we siblings whilst we don't have your love at all, so you are in fact lucky.

Unfortunately it was my brother's wife and my sibling's girlfriend who told her to talk with her family, except they probably don't know that her family has ruined her life. in reality she is very lucky too to have a good family, a lot of mothers don't have that, and has a good life, yet is always angry and only lives for her family. She only cares about her, and about why her mother wouldn't give her love, big deal she was an idiot like you, get over it, it's not like you have to be the copy of your own mother, you can be you. I am completely opposite in personality by my own mother, and that's fine, we develop our own personalities, we shouldn't act in that manner.

Anyway, yes younger sibling is quite dangerous, for some reason he has been bullying me and my elder brother, as someone is teaching him that he can defame us and the rest of the family. Idk why you'd be against your own family, you are not smart and yes it can be manipulation, but some people resist to manipulation. If someone tries to manipulate me they know they are going down, and in fact they raise their hands, because it doesn't work, but it's not my fault that I am immune to manipulation, however, it's still sad that he'd throw his life over an idiot who doesn't even love us, and alienate the only people who care, for idiots who don't care. Just a really toxic loser personality, whereas he used to be so cool. I am shocked at how he changed. I wonder the company he keeps, however, due to the bs he told me, I am going to keep my distance now, as I have no choice.
 
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Aug 2021
155
92
Austin, TX
I am so sorry to hear this, yes, you know that children learn behavior from their parents by mirroring it. I hope you can reconcile at some point with your brother, you may have to step up and be the mature one who keeps the relationship open. It may not be easy, but we all hate to see a family broken up, no matter what the cause...
 
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Reactions: Usedandabused
Jul 2021
420
51
London
I am so sorry to hear this, yes, you know that children learn behavior from their parents by mirroring it. I hope you can reconcile at some point with your brother, you may have to step up and be the mature one who keeps the relationship open. It may not be easy, but we all hate to see a family broken up, no matter what the cause...
I think he has adopted this abusive personality by his girlfriend who is an abuser and even abuses him, and from my mother's family and I think it's just toxic. I do believe he is an adult. I understand they must be both sick for being easily dragged into these crazy scenarios. I understand it is a disability or something that makes them this way, but I think they should go to the doctor, as they can't make everyone else sick, and sorry you should be able to talk with your family about traumatic events, and Idk it's just a girlfriend, if she is an abuser, you can dump her, you are not bonded by blood, the family comes before the girlfriend, particularly the good family, like myself, then he should really find a different girlfriend who empathises with him and the family, not someone who wants to use the family, and an abuser.

It is difficult for everyone to dump an abusive boyfriend or girlfriend, but he had the good role model that did, I avoided abusive dates myself, and it happens to everyone nowadays is so common but not stick around. If needs help in doing that because he is stalked or blackmailed or whatever he can let the family know, but not rationalise crazy behaviour, and adopt the person's behaviours too, once you turn into an abuser it is hard to stop it, as I have never managed to stop an abuser in its tracks, it is really difficult. It's not like he needs her financially too, so I don't understand why he puts up with it. Anyway, I avoid them now because I think my life is more important than that of someone who doesn't want to be mature. I think if someone is abusing you physically then really it is hard to maintain contact with them, and it's hard to repair that kind of damage. I think by abusing someone physically you are explaining that you refuse siblings. It is the right thing to do to avoid them, and it isn't immature at all.

Apparently one bad girlfriend can be the tip of the iceberg into destroying people's families, so the parent should make sure the child even if adult doesn't date crazy people that can jeopardise the family. In that regard, when my mother doesn't agree with my father in that he is acting abusive, it is wrong. Again the gut feeling about his girlfriend was right, and I was invalidated provoking a shock in me as you have her described as this perfect person that is actually a monster, once again.

At least men are stronger at least when they get abused, but I have 0 strength so unfortunately I don't want him around.
 
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