Can someone explain for me, why I'm I addicted to my first crush. So I had my first, real crush at the age of 14. I've never sheared my feelings with him, because I thought my feelings was not real. Now i'am 17, I moved in another city, I started high school but I still feel strong connection with him. Like I really love to dream about him, it gives me positive energy. sometimes I have virtual connection with him. like I'am thinking about if he would be there what would he say or something. And I think I'm addicted to ideal of him, person that I created in my thoughts. He really exist, but I don't know him very well, so I think the way I think he is and the way he really is are not the same. We have talked too many times and we had like a chemistry. And during this time I've met too many boys but I can't feel the same. Even if a guy telling me that he likes me or he thinks about me, I feel absolutely nothing. So what does it means? by the way I don't stalk him because I don't have any social platforms.