I am obsessively thinking about technology. It started 2 years ago when i started to read phone reviews. I was fascinated. It soon turned to an obsession. I would draw a sketch of the phone on a clean sheet of paper and write it's specs ( screen size , resolution, storage, RAM ) beside the sketch. It soon became worse as i tried to aim for perfection. Even if one number in the specs was written wrongly by accident, i would rip the paper and start all over again. I spent countless hours a day sketching and writing spec sheets.
It deacsnded to another level. I had read so many phone reveiws and made so many spec sheets to the point where i could name you the mo. Of megapixels in the ultrawide camera of the Redmi Note 8. I became 'tech fluent'
Armed with this 'tech fluency' my madness/obsession ascended to another level. I lost in phones made by conventional phone manufacturers. I wanted to make my own phone. But as an ordinary guy I couldn't. I had no factory, no engineers, no money to do so. So i began writing the spec sheets and drawing sketches of the phones i would like to make. I put a huge amount of effort and time to make the sketch as neat as possible. The spec sheets looked like they had been printed, not hand written. This was utterly crazy.i made spec sheets like that for perhaps over 100 phones that hypothetically occured to my mind. I wanted to make the perfect phone. Whenever i made a really awesome spec sheet i would gaze at it in admiration for hours on end, even going as far as to sleep with the spec sheets under my pillow. I would losw track of the time and forget entire meals. Such an obsession.
I hated and loved this at the same time. It was fascinating to think about technology. Yet i hated it at the same time because it was a huge waste of time. I would gain no benefit from doing this. It made me irritated and angry.
One day i became so angry that i ripped all my sketches and spec sheets and threw them away. Since then i have lost my obsession with phones.
Now the obsession has returned. Not for phones - but for computers. It's driving me mad. I draw sketch after sketch, write spec sheet sfter spec sheet and spend hours thinking about it. It's fascinating , and enjoyable at times but i hate it because its such a huge waste of time and effort. Its interfering with my work and life .I want to get rid of this but i cant help myself.
Please help me identify my problem. What is the name of the disorder i have described above ?
Thank you in advance.
It deacsnded to another level. I had read so many phone reveiws and made so many spec sheets to the point where i could name you the mo. Of megapixels in the ultrawide camera of the Redmi Note 8. I became 'tech fluent'
Armed with this 'tech fluency' my madness/obsession ascended to another level. I lost in phones made by conventional phone manufacturers. I wanted to make my own phone. But as an ordinary guy I couldn't. I had no factory, no engineers, no money to do so. So i began writing the spec sheets and drawing sketches of the phones i would like to make. I put a huge amount of effort and time to make the sketch as neat as possible. The spec sheets looked like they had been printed, not hand written. This was utterly crazy.i made spec sheets like that for perhaps over 100 phones that hypothetically occured to my mind. I wanted to make the perfect phone. Whenever i made a really awesome spec sheet i would gaze at it in admiration for hours on end, even going as far as to sleep with the spec sheets under my pillow. I would losw track of the time and forget entire meals. Such an obsession.
I hated and loved this at the same time. It was fascinating to think about technology. Yet i hated it at the same time because it was a huge waste of time. I would gain no benefit from doing this. It made me irritated and angry.
One day i became so angry that i ripped all my sketches and spec sheets and threw them away. Since then i have lost my obsession with phones.
Now the obsession has returned. Not for phones - but for computers. It's driving me mad. I draw sketch after sketch, write spec sheet sfter spec sheet and spend hours thinking about it. It's fascinating , and enjoyable at times but i hate it because its such a huge waste of time and effort. Its interfering with my work and life .I want to get rid of this but i cant help myself.
Please help me identify my problem. What is the name of the disorder i have described above ?
Thank you in advance.
